THE WEEK THAT WAS….

‘Anything you can do we can do better’ – forget Isner and Mahut’s 6-4, 3-6, 6-7, 7-6 and 70-68 marathon at Wimbledon.  That was only 11 hours and five minutes of play spread over three days.  This week the Assembly managed to sit for 19 hours and three minutes in just two days.  Sadly there was no rain to interrupt play.

It’s not that long ago everyone was bemoaning the absence of legislative activity, but like a panic-stricken fifteen year finishing off his course work before the final deadline the Assembly progressed 16 separate pieces of Executive Business.  All important and necessary stuff, but did the Business Office collectively forget there was a Recess coming?  Didn’t they notice the tell tale signs of summer – sun, long evenings, parades?

There were some interesting exchanges during the Budget debate.  It was almost as if someone had picked up a compendium of ‘Yes Minster’; the scales fell from their eyes and they realised for the first time that the bureaucracy of Government is not always there to facilitate decisions by politicians.

The Finance Minister argued that the Budget process is “lengthy, convoluted and repetitive — very repetitive on some occasions”.  He also confessed that the whole process lacks transparency and that financial publications produced for the Assembly “did not lend themselves to easy scrutiny and challenge”.  Whether that is the fault of the Mandarins or the Ministers, keen to defend their budgets in the gloom of obfuscating double speak, is a matter for debate.  Necessity is the mother of invention, however, and the small matter of having to find c.£1bn worth of savings has had the wonderful effect of concentrating minds on delivering value for the taxpayer.

As Dr. Farry (Alliance, North Down) pointed out during the incredibly lengthy Wildlife Bill debate, President Obama’s Chief of Staff, Rahm Emanuel, argued that a good crisis should never be allowed to go to waste.  With an inevitable contraction of the public sector due, is this Northern Ireland’s chance to shed its Keynesian Republic image, trim its excessive Government layers and give the private sector room to grow? Alternatively, given a track record of indecision and dither, we may just stagger through unchanged.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

The FM is hopeful the EU will help fund a Conflict Resolution Centre at the former Maze Prison and noted that he’s waiting for the Coalition Govt. to bring out a paper on the possibilities of devolving power to amend Corporation Tax.

Over at DRD the Minister revealed that the new road between Londonderry and Aughnacloy has cost £27m so far, expressed his unwillingness to transfer any powers to local councils in the absence of RPA and confirmed that he’s asked DFP for an extra £2.3m to cover the popularity of subsidized fares for the over 60s.  The DSD Minister discussed regeneration of the Lower Falls and has a bid of £5m with the Executive to fund a Mortgage Relief scheme.

Written Answers

The new Parades Bill should be out for consultation within weeks according to OFMDFM, DCAL’s consultants are still working on the business case for new sports stadia for Football, Gaelic and Rugby while the DETI Minister confirmed that she’s made five official visits to West Belfast.

Environment confirmed that February was the first month on record without a fatality and that deaths this year are running at less than half of those last year.  DFP revealed that no civil servants have been sent on anger management classes in the last five years and DoJ confirmed that Lithuanians top the list of foreign nationals who have served sentences of over one year locally (there are only nine of them though).  DRD estimates that the average daily flow of traffic on Belfast’s Lisburn Rd is 19,954 vehicles.

COMMITTEES

Cockle fishing on Belfast Lough was tickling DARD’s fancy, DFP was considering how the Assembly scrutinises the Budget and DEL was contemplating redundancies at Quinn Group.  Education was trying to work out what the secret is to running a good secondary school in a disadvantaged area while DETI was reviewing implementation of MATRIX’s proposals.  DCAL was briefed on Derry / Londonderry’s Capital of Culture bid, Environment was back on the tee at Knock Golf Club, Health was back on Sunbeds and Justice was considering a draft Community Safety strategy.

AND FINALLY….

With the House sitting three days next week instead of the usual two, MLAs are beginning to despair if there ever will be a ‘finally’ this year.

Roll on the Recess!

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

What a stroke of bad fortune that was.  You wait all those years to finally decide that the reform of Local Govt. won’t be happening any time soon, and just as you’re about to explain to the electorate why £9m has drifted off into the ether, along comes the Saville report into Bloody Sunday and hardly anyone notices.  Doh! What are the chances! 

Such is the robustness of the political process, the implications of Saville were – so far – taken with barely a break in anyone’s stride.  The Prime Minister’s fulsome and magnanimous acceptance of the findings drew the sting out of potential nationalist anger, while unionists seemed assuaged by his equally fulsome praise for the role of the army generally and a shying away from calling from prosecutions. 

The point that on the day the Deputy First Minister was “probably” carrying a Thompson machine gun that was probably used in previous gun attacks didn’t even seem to cause anyone to break a sweat.  Changed times indeed.

Times were also changing on the Floor of the House during the week’s lengthy Budget debates.  Not everyone may have accepted the realities of the scorched earth Budget which is coming next week from Westminster, but at least more MLAs than usual spared us their fantasy wish list of services which exist in a parallel universe were the laws of macro-economics are frozen in a state of suspended animation.

That said, despite the fact that the outlook for the NI Budget was “bleak” requiring “tough”, “painful” and “unpalatable” decisions, the delusions remain, not least the stubborn refusal by many to even countenance water charges or the persistent belief that all our ills lie at the feet of those nasty bankers, overlooking the role of individuals and politicians alike who pigged out on cheap money with gay abandon.

There will be no easy solutions.  MLAs want budgets to be “scrutinized”, trimmed senior public servant salaries and greater funding for R&D.  Given the tsunami of cuts coming, MLAs may as well whistle in the wind; services across the board are going to be sliced.  It’s not quite the ‘Shared Future’ we were promised, but it’s all you’re going to get.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

The Environment Minister was alluding to cuts of £1.25bn over the next three years which precluded the Executive from paying the upfront costs of Local Govt. reform.  He also had a pop at Sinn Fein for not agreeing to the business model which would have delivered the maximum amount of savings from RPA.

Over at DFP the Minister discussed deprivation in West Belfast, noted that all those farmers who had difficulty reading maps for their EU subsidy applications will cost taxpayers at least £3m and warned that raising the regional rate by 20% would only raise £128m.  The Health Minister, meanwhile, argued he has no room for further cuts.

Written Answers

OFMDFM defended itself against complaints that it’s taken at least four years to establish an Older Peoples Commissioner, DARD spends £43m annually on the Agri-Food Biosciences Institute annually and DCAL confirmed that £20K has been spent on an Ulster-Scots dictionary.

Almost 70 schools have closed over the past decade according to Education, DEL revealed that NI’s participation rate in Higher Education (50%) is the highest in the UK and DETI disclosed that unemployment is lowest in Strangford and Lagan Valley (3.5%).  DoE listed 37 different pieces of legislation dealing with noise issues and highlighted Belfast as the worst recycling council in NI (22.4%).  DFP identified Carrickfergus as the council area with the lowest number of suicides in 2009 – two compared to 62 in Belfast.

COMMITTEES

DARD was Equality Screening its Farm Modernisation scheme (are Massey’s being discriminated against?), DoE was flying high with seat sales at Belfast City Airport, DFP is investigating insurance costs and DRD was on the buses with Translink’s planning assumptions.

DoE was focused on Road Safety, DSD was towing the Caravans Bill, DETI was sniffing biogas and DCAL met the movie moguls from NI Screen.  Justice is courting popularity by trying to pick the pockets of barristers by cutting back on legal aid.

AND FINALLY….

Budget debates aren’t the same since Declan O’Loan, one of the Assembly’s few financial brains who has progressed from abacus to scientific calculator, was dismissed to the SDLP “naughty step” for a time-out to contemplate his views on nationalist realignment.  With no whip, the learned member wasn’t inclined to share his views.

Somebody else on the naughty step is Israel after its abortive raid on a Gaza relief flotilla.  They’ve called in former First Minister David Trimble as an independent investigator.  With the events of this week still fresh in his mind, he’ll be wary of doing a ‘Widgery’. 

Given, however, that some had been tipping him as David Cameron’s Attorney General, Mr. Trimble will have plenty of time on the long flight to Tel Aviv to contemplate what might have been.

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

Business in the House was never going to make for prime time viewing, but in recent months what little did pass for entertainment seems to have dried up.  The atmosphere is as flat as Rio Ferdinand’s ‘welcome’ home party from the World Cup and as enticing as free membership of the Dublin branch of the French football team’s supporters’ club. 

It needs some serious oomph – otherwise the next four weeks before the summer recess are going to be as much fun as an Adjournment debate on Strangford’s many and varied potholes.  If only Mastermind would allow it as a specialist subject some of the Members would be in with a realistic shout at the title.

Maybe it’s the proximity of the recess which has sucked the lifeblood out of the place.  Maybe it’s the scandals, the Westminster campaign, the interminable negotiations over Justice which actually delivered something or the interminable negotiations over RPA which look like going nowhere.  Maybe they’re all just a bit punch drunk? Probably they’d all rather be at home watching Chile vs Switzerland.

While tribal controversies are never far away – next week there’s the Bloody Sunday report and the Tour of the North parade to get worked up about – the political process has been robust enough to survive everything which has been thrown at it to date.

Leader writers often wring their hands in despair at the calibre of person which politics attracts.  In the past people could offer up the not unreasonable excuse that putting yourself up for public scrutiny led to new additions to the family – such as a four-man personal protection squad.  It’s hard to have a quiet night in with the missus when there are six of you.

But the truth is, most people – including those from the professional classes – don’t want to actively get involved because politics is mostly dull, particularly when you get down to the nitty-gritty of actual governance.  Who in their right mind is interested in River Bann Navigation Orders or Donaghadee Harbour Orders?  Don’t be too hard on your representatives.  It’s miserable work. But somebody’s got to do it.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

The DFM revealed more details about the upcoming US Investment conference, had little progress to report on help from the Treasury for PMS savers and admitted that with so many parties involved in the Executive, Departments tend to work in “silos”.

The DEL Minister confessed that most of his staff are “low paid” and advised that about 2/3 of local students in GB return home eventually.  The DETI Minister talked up the benefits of Titanic Quarter and the NI Science Park, welcomed Aitricity to the domestic electricity market and noted that while GB visitors to NI have fallen by 8%, those from the Republic are up by 32% on the year.

Written Answers

OFMDFM noted that it funds the Equality Commission to the tune of £6.99m and £8.9m for the Community Relations Council annually.  The DCAL Minister’s ‘Minority Languages’ strategy is being held up in ongoing correspondence with the Education Minister while DETI has spent £250K to date on RPA.

Education confirmed that of the 2,070 teachers who qualified in the past three years, less than half are employed as full-time teachers, DoE revealed strong public support for the reduction of drink-driving limits and DFP advised that there are 246 vacancies in the Civil Service.  Health disclosed that toilets in the Royal Victoria are cleaned twice as often as those in the Mater and Justice noted that Court fines for road offences totaled £3.3m last year and that there were 6,754 shoplifting offences.

COMMITTEES

DFP was considering rating for empty houses, DEL was musing over how to widen participation in the Higher Education sector while Education was ‘toying’ with Early Years strategy.  Environment was ‘mucking’ about with the Waste & Contaminated Land Bill and the new DSD Minister briefed his Committee on his departmental Corporate Plan.

OFMDFM went AWOL to Brussels, the Tourist Board briefed DCAL on its tourism strategy and DETI was doing its bit for the Social Enterprise sector.  Things are warming up over at Health with the new Sunbed legislation.

AND FINALLY….

The only saving grace of Northern Ireland’s wretched history is that it provides a fair degree of material of the little banter that does occur – sometimes popping up in the most unexpected places.

For instance, during the Adjournment debate on works to the A2 Carrickfergus road, Ken Robinson (UUP, Antrim East) complained that 300 years ago King Billy also encountered difficulties on the road en route to the Boyne.  The Sinn Fein DRD Minister retorted that if he’d known it was so easy, he would have taken action earlier to block the road and “save us a lot of problems”.  Wonder if that would have passed a Section 75 Equality Assessment?

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

“Thorn in my side, you know that’s all you ever were. A bundle of lies – you know that’s all that it was worth.  I should have known better, but I trusted you at first.  I should have known better, but I got what I deserved….”

The recent murder of Bobby Moffett on the Shankill , apparently by individuals “linked to the UVF”, has reminded everybody that it’s not just dissident Republicans who like to dip into the ‘physical force’ tradition when it suits.  Maybe, just maybe though the paramilitaries may have overstepped the mark this time.

The ‘balaclava brigade’ have always thrived as parasites on the backs of their ‘host communities’ – ‘thorn in my side’ wouldn’t begin, however, to describe the extortion, criminality and summary justice which the self-styled protectors of the community like to inflict upon their own areas.  Problem is, it was easier to get away with murder when you could do it under the cover of full blown inter-community strife.  Strip that away and it allows the light to shine that bit more brightly on the seedy underbelly of life.

Apart from spurring significant numbers on the Shankill to stand up to the various text threats which have been issued against those who were appalled by the murder, Mr. Moffett’s death has also left the UVF-linked PUP without its leader, Dawn Purvis (Belfast East) who has quit over the incident to sit as an independent in the Assembly. 

Given the recent disastrous electoral performance of Unionist leaders in the TUV, DUP and UUP perhaps she was feeling left out?  The move will, however, enhance Ms Purvis’ already good reputation among the chattering classes; those left wondering why she didn’t make the move earlier will have to wait for an answer.

Talking about ‘thorns in my side’, mainstream Unionists will have been mightily disappointed to learn that the TUV ‘haven’t gone away’.  The party confirmed this week that reports of its demise are premature.  Looks like all those hopes that the poor performance in the General Election would finish off the loquacious Mr. Allister were – how would Annie Lenox put it? – just ‘Sweet Dreams’.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

The DARD Minister received a surprisingly gentle ride over the £60m fines from the EU over all those ‘confused’ claims by local farmers, nor was she overly concerned about the impact on farmers of vesting 100,000 acres along the route of the new A5 in Tyrone.

Over at DCAL the Minister was happy to talk up the benefits of Ulster-Scots funding, the new PRONI HQ at Titanic Quarter and the potential of the Creative Industries (as opposed to Creationism).  The Education Minister continued to be a source of aggravation; this week over the role of churches in the controlled sector and the availability of pre-school places.

Written Answers

A less than exciting list of questions this week to peruse.  OFMDFM noted that over 58,000 pensioners live in relative low income poverty, Education has spent £68K on translations / publications for Irish and £35 for Ulster Scots, while DETI estimated that between 120K and 150K people attended this year’s NW200.

DoE confirmed that Belfast Council spent £9m on economic development last year, Derry was next with £4.7m while Ballymoney spent just £200K.  Justice revealed that there are 16 juveniles in custody and that its aim is to cut the legal aid budget by 25%.

COMMITTEES

DCAL was totting up its figures, DARD had the joys of the EU’s Amateur Vegetable Directive to savour, DEL is still ‘NEET-picking’ and DFP is inquiring after public sector efficiencies.  DRD was traversing some of its major road upgrades, OFMDFM was updated on developments at the Maze (that must have been short) and DoE considered the needs of children as part of the Road Safety strategy.

Language strategy was getting DCAL tongue tied, DETI plunged into the red with consideration of the Debt Relief Bill and Justice threw itself on the mercy of officials to brief them on the upcoming Justice Bill.

AND FINALLY….

If you’re struggling at your desk this beautiful Friday afternoon waiting for the weekend to arrive, spare a thought for our poor MLAs who have been recalled for a special debate this afternoon on the Gaza crisis. 

Given the plethora of home-made problems sitting unloved on Stormont’s doorsteps, one would have thought that a foreign affairs issue may not have been the best reason for a special recall.  Mind you, as the rest of us have to suffer 9 – 5, five days a week, sympathy for MLAs is likely to be limited.

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

Life is full of unintended consequences.  When Coalition forces invaded Iraq they didn’t expect to unleash a sectarian civil war which would claim more casualties than the original invasion. 

When the Tory right drove John Major’s Government into oblivion with the comforting thought that five years out of power would help them regroup, they didn’t imagine that 13-years later the party still wouldn’t be able to form a Government by itself.  Likewise, at the end of Ghostbusters, Dan Aykroyd’s character didn’t intend to conjure up a 50ft Stay Puff Marshmallow Man whose intention it was to destroy the world.

When Unionists decided that a unity candidate was the best way to win back Fermanagh & South Tyrone, they didn’t anticipate that the SDLP vote in the constituency would collapse or that Sinn Fein would ‘stand aside’ in South Belfast to give Alasdair McDonnell a clear run.  Nor did they expect debates about Unionist unity to spark similar debates among the ranks of Nationalists, especially not within the ranks of the SDLP Assembly team.

Thus, when the SDLP’s bookish Declan O’Loan (North Antrim) thought it would be a good idea to fly a few kites on the issue of Nationalist unity, more than a few eyebrows were raised.  Indeed, such was the ire within the SDLP leadership that the former teacher (dubbed ‘Himself Alone’ by the Irish News) was given six of best before having the whip withdrawn indefinitely. 

Given, however, that there is nothing marshmallow-like about Mr. O’Loan’s grey matter – he’s one of the few MLAs who can string together coherent thoughts on the complexities of Government finance without a  well prepared script – it’s unlikely that the banishment will become permanent.

On the SDLP front benches the new DSD Minister, Alex Attwood, was, however, finding his gooey streak, taking a conciliatory approach with all and sundry.  This is not the Alex Attwood we have all come to know and love.  Hopefully normal service will return soon.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

The First Minister indicated he was happy for all MLAs to take a 5% pay cut, put the stalling of RPA down to uncertainties over how restructuring Local Govt. would actually deliver savings, reported little progress from the Treasury on the Presbyterian Mutual Society and noted that OFMDFM staff had the best absenteeism record in the NI Civil Service.

The new DSD Minister covered off town centre regeneration, Living Over the Shop schemes and plans to start 2,000 new social house units in the upcoming financial year.  The Justice Minister talked up Cultural Diversity training for Prison Officers, assessed the current security situation and noted that over 500 people have been electronically tagged.

Written Answers

OFMDFM indicated the long expected CSI strategy will go out to public consultation in June while Jim ‘Strangford’ Shannon asked DARD to comment on its support for Glastry Ice Cream’s new ‘lavender’ flavour and what the DETI Minister was doing to promote jobs in Comber.

Environment was inundated with questions about redeploying Planning Officials, DFP confirmed that absenteeism in the Civil Service has fallen to 11 days from 15.5 days in 2003 / 04 and 452 people are on police bail in North Belfast according to Justice.  DRD reported that Ulsterbus has over 30 buses in operation which are over 18-years olds and that it hopes to introduce legislation for Belfast Rapid Transit system this June.

COMMITTEES

The Health Minister had the dubious pleasure of discussing revised spending plans, Cockle Fishing was tickling DARD’s fancy and DFP was examining public sector efficiencies.  DRD hitched a lift on Public Transport reform, Integrated Education was feeling all cross-community with Education and Environment considered how to squeeze more money out of Europe.  DCAL was briefed on Museums’ strategy, Justice got up to speed with the Criminal Justice Inspectorate and DSD went for a jolly to the Slieve Donard.

AND FINALLY….

Unfortunately for Stormont, in what was a rather good week for work of the House – with measures to become the first region in the British Isles to tackle sunbed abuse and a commendable Private Members’ Bill from John McCallister (UUP South Down) to improve the lot of caravan owners – the debacle over RPA and the Maze site which have consumed millions but delivered nothing has rather taken the lustre off.

Given that the deficit squeeze means that we’re all going to be living on a diet which makes the WWII rationing recipe of Squirrel Tale Soup look positively appetising, such profligacy is not going to be popular.

Fortunately, though, a recent survey suggested that £57m is lurking down the back of sofas across the UK.  We just need to find some time in the Finance Minister’s diary to visit the country’s 22 million households…..

The Exceptional Item related to a £13.9m contribution towards the new Titanic Signature Building in Titanic Quarter.  Other capital investment projects with a value of £24m, including the development of the island’s longest deep-water berth, were also completed. 

Overall trade during 2009 fell by 4% to 15.7m, reflecting the continuing impact of the difficult trading environment in the economy generally.  Belfast, however, outperformed other Irish ports such as Dublin and Cork, and increased its market share of the Irish Sea Roll-On / Roll-Off sector to 20%.  

Trades associated with the agri-food sector recorded double digit growth and passenger numbers rose strongly by 3% to 1.33m. Looking forward, trading figures from the start of 2010 suggest that there has been an upturn in business activity.

Commenting on the results, Len O’Hagan, Belfast Harbour’s Chairman, said: 

“2009 was a difficult year for the economy, but initial figures from quarter one of this year suggest, however, that economic activity is on the up with both imports and exports through the Port increasing.  

“While economic uncertainty has slowed down the pace of investment by Belfast Harbour, a number of major projects have been initiated or completed, not least the Titanic Signature Building which is also supported by the Northern Ireland Executive, Belfast City Council and Titanic Quarter Ltd.  The project is the single most important regeneration project underway in Belfast Harbour Estate and will help drive significant tourism and investment interest in Northern Ireland generally.

“Maritime related projects included a major upgrade of the Harbour’s road access at Dargan to Northern Ireland’s motorway network; an extension of our deep-water facilities which were used by 35 cruise ships; a 70% increase in handling capacity for paper imports and a new £6m storage facility for the agri-food sector.  Over the past few years Belfast Harbour has invested heavily in new infrastructure and we will continue to upgrade and develop new facilities to meet the long-term demands of the local economy.”

The report noted other regeneration projects within the Harbour Estate such as the completion of a 50,000 sq ft facility by the Northern Ireland Science Park and ongoing work at Belfast Metropolitan College’s new campus and PRONI’s new headquarters, all within Titanic Quarter. 

Mr. O’Hagan also praised Harbour employees who contributed 10,000 employee hours towards the planning and hosting of the Tall Ships Festival which attracted up to 500,000 visitors to the Harbour Estate in August 2009, making it Northern Ireland’s largest ever outdoor event.  A further 10,000 people visited Belfast Harbour Office, attending charitable, education and business-related events facilitated by the Harbour Authority as part of its community programme.

Malcolm Corbett, CEO, INCA

INCA, the UK-wide body for the promotion of Next Generation Broadband infrastructure, willbe hosting its first ever Northern Ireland Roadshow in Belfast’s Titanic Quarter on June 17th.  The group has warned that broadband provision in the UK already lags behind its competitors with many countries making faster progress towards Next Generation services.

The event, which is aimed at local businesses, local government and community leaders, will provide an opportunity to help shape the UK-wide debate on how best to roll-out direct fibre connections to every home and business, and learn about its economic and community development potential. 

INCA (Independent Networks Co-operative Association) is organizing the event at Titanic Quarter to help explain how Next Generation Broadband can help boost economic recovery and improve community life.  Malcolm Corbett, INCA’s CEO, said: 

“BT’s welcome announcement to extend Next Generation coverage to 60% of the UK population is great. It makes clear that we need to work on the final 40% and on the problem of extending the reach of fibre to all premises.  

“Currently many people in Northern Ireland can’t get the minimum 2mbps broadband, a problem which affects about 11% of the UK population. While the Belfast event will look at some technical issues, we will also discuss how communities themselves can get involved in developing Next Generation Broadband networks by using public and/or private partnerships to boost both innovation and economic competiveness. 

“Next Generation Broadband has huge potential.  It will bring much faster speeds to homes and businesses, expanding the scope and choice of services available, particularly in areas such as health provision, education, entertainment and business services.  It will unlock innovation and it is important that Northern Ireland has the infrastructure to exploit these new opportunities.“  

Speakers at the event will include some of the UK’s leading broadband experts such as Sinclair Stockman, BT’s former Chief Scientist, as well as experts from continental Europe. Edgar Aker, Director of Marketing & Product Management, EMEA, Draka; Klaus Kammermeier Exec. Director Marketing Carrier, EMEA, Corning, and Christer Karlsson, Vice President Strategy & Business Development of Swedish Netadmin are among those attending.  A keynote address will also be given by BT’s Frank McManus.  

Delegates will have the opportunity to learn what action is already taking place in Northern Ireland as well as nationally and internationally, and discuss the future needs of both local businesses and communities for Next Generation Broadband. 

Michael Graham, Titanic Quarter Ltd’s Director of Corporate Real Estate, added: 

“We are delighted to host this event.  Titanic Quarter already has advanced plans to deploy one of the UK’s most significant Open Access Carrier Neutral Network projects with fibre direct to every occupant, providing access to a wide choice of Next Generation Broadband services.   

“It’s important, however, that Northern Ireland as a whole makes the most of projects such as Project Kelvin which provides a direct fast-fibre link to North America. Without high quality local access networks, however, the economic and societal advantages may not be realized.  The INCA roadshow is part of a UK-wide initiative which will help shape the roll-out of better broadband access networks across the entire country.” 

The event will include a number of workshop sessions offering discussions and insight into topics such as fibre to the home, building partnerships as well as new applications and services.  There will also be specialist meet-the-experts ‘advice clinic’ sessions looking at issues such as technology, how to get projects off the ground and how to choose the right business model. 

For a more detailed overview, please visit: http://www.inca.coop/events/nextgen-roadshow-northern-ireland. Delegate places are limited and free.  Please register at: http://www.regonline.co.uk/Checkin.asp?EventId=853823 selecting the ‘invited guest’ option.

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

“The years spent in isolation have not equipped him with the tools necessary to judge right from wrong. He’s had no context. He’s been completely without guidance. It seems clear that his awareness of what we call reality is radically underdeveloped.”

So thought a psychologist of the leading character in Tim Burton’s 1990 movie, ‘Edward Scissorhands’.  I don’t know so much about the finger-chopping Edward, but it sounds like a rather apt description of Northern Ireland’s body politic every time someone mentions the ‘N’ phrase – ‘National Debt’.

It will haunt the former Chief Secretary to the Treasury until he dies, but Liam Byrne’s naughty note to his successor was rather more succinct about the state of the UK’s finances than any economist could be:

“Dear Chief Secretary, I’m afraid to tell you there’s no money left. Kind regards – and good luck! Liam.”  How many histories of the New Labour years will be shaped by that pithy insight?  If you listen closely you can actually hear the phrase spur on the corrosive effects of time on the Iron Chancellor’s already rusty reputation.

Back home Northern Ireland was treated to a visit by the new PM, head of a previously unheard of party – the Liberal Conservatives – who bounded into town to reassure everyone that the Sassenachs weren’t coming to strip the place bare after all.  Good job too, there’s not much worth stripping. 

Too many local politicians, however, seem to have lost touch with reality, still plugging the line that Northern Ireland should be exempt from any cuts – certainly not any as far reaching as George Gideon ‘Scissorhands’ Osborne may have in mind.

Even Finance Minister, Sammy ‘Sound as a Pound’ Wilson, was eager to jump aboard the political life raft that devolved Assemblies could postpone this year’s cuts until next year, when no doubt there’ll be an even larger axe to be swung.  Welcoming the news last night he argued that Northern Ireland had a different business cycle to the rest of the UK. 

With Assembly elections looming, I wonder did he mean to say ‘election cycle’?

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

During a dull session, the Finance Minister confirmed that no Departments had sought extra funds to deal with pressures caused by migrants; he also tellingly agreed that the House had “evaded and avoided” the issue of water charges.

For once the Chamber sprung into life during Health Questions with North Belfast and Mid-Ulster MLAs getting increasingly incandescent about unavoidable closures of local A&E Units. The Minister also dealt with MS services, outlined plans to save £88m by proscribing generic rather than branded drugs and reveled in the fact that only Health had met its RPA targets.  The DRD Minister, unsurprisingly, ruled out the possibility of a Bangor – Belfast motoroway.

Written Answers

OFMDFM is planning to trim 51 staff by 2011, the DCAL Minister produced his letter of congratulations to Tony McCoy on winning the Grand National and Education is spending £32.7m on the Girls’ Model school in Belfast. 

DETI has estimated the initial loss of tourism pounds thanks to the Icelandic volcano at £1.8m and confirmed that the Executive’s sub-committee on the economy met for the first time yesterday.

DoE still doesn’t have a date for the public inquiry into the extension of Belfast City Airport’s runway, DFP noted that there are 285 Arabs living in Northern Ireland while Justice set out its aim to cut anti-social behaviour by 15% by 2011.

COMMITTEES

DARD contemplated the preservation of Sea Bass, Welfare Reform engaged DSD, while DEL was still trying to get those NEETs out of everyone’s hair.  The IBOA banked on DFP support for their campaign against the sale of First Trust, DRD dug into the issue of Street Works while Education marked the report card of the Irish-medium sector.

Environment lit up the North / South Interconnector, DETI evaluated the NI Science Park while DCAL is still running round after its sport participation inquiry.  Health considered its capital budget and Justice began getting its teeth into its first Justice Bill.

AND FINALLY….

All this talk of fiscal responsibility may have prompted a piece in the South Belfast News about how money has been spent on Belfast City Councillors.  I know the public sector is often accused of flushing money down the toilet, but nobody really thought that was literally the case. Until….

Step up to the mark Clllr. Niall ‘the Can’ Kelly who apparently was dispatched to Birmingham for the ‘Loo of the Year’ awards at the grand cost of £406.09.

Talk about spending a penny!

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

Politics isn’t what it used to be.  The sight of Messrs Paisley and McGuinness chuckling all the way to the Division Lobbies was unsettling enough, but the new Nick & Dave show now airing on Channel No.10 is possibly even more bizarre.  If the ‘season launch’ of this Rom Com is anything to go by, this mightn’t be the flash-in-the-pan dalliance the cynics are predicting.

Karl von Clausewitz said that war is merely the continuation of politics by other means.  One rather suspects that coalition government is merely party politics by an alternative method.  Peter Robinson predicted that Government with Sinn Fein would be a ‘battle a day’ – the Tories and Liberals aren’t there yet, but the time will surely come.  The mutually self assured destruction which would ensue from an early election held in the after burn of stinging public sector cuts and tax rises should, however, be incentive enough to keep the show on the road until those elusive green shoots start appearing.

The emergence of the Coalition has, though, put pay to the prospects of Northern Ireland MPs (at least those who show up) punching above their weight in a hung Parliament.  The somewhat fanciful and grubby notion that we were going to be spared the pain of the rest of the UK by selling our votes to the highest bidder (£200m was apparently the asking price) now looks as likely as Gordon Brown giving classes on voter empathy.  The message from the Treasury is now likely to be ‘Suck it up’.

To compensate, MLAs were getting rather excited about cutting Corporate Tax in much the same way as those who discovered the wonder drug that is penicillin. MLA after MLA regurgitated the findings of the Economic Reform Group’s report that cutting the rate was NI’s only way to break its addiction to the public sector (a bit like enjoying Whopper Burgers too much – nice at the time, but ultimately unsatisfying and artery clogging).

Finance Minister Sammy Wilson, was on hand, however, with a suitably large bucket of cold water.  Over six years the scheme would cost the Executive £1bn and take 11 years to pay for itself. Even the magical powers of ‘New Politics’ doesn’t extend to creating something out of nothing.  Back to the drawing board boys.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

Jnr Minister Gerry Kelly addressed queries about Children & Young People, the Deputy First Minister reiterated his opposition to any cuts in the block grant, revealed that his and the FM’s recent trip to Washington cost £58,455.  He also declined to specify what exactly “sectarian harassment” means in the upcoming parades legislation.

The DETI Minister confirmed that she has no plans or powers to interfere with the sale of First Trust Bank by AIB and noted that Invest NI has spent £73m supporting the local agri-food sector since 2002.  The Environment Minister couldn’t confirm if RPA would happen next year and Assembly Commission questions revealed that up to 25 Bills could be introduced at Stormont over the coming months.

Written Answers

Not much this week; MLAs have been too busy canvassing to ask questions.  OFMDFM noted, however, that the Maze Development Corporation is still to be formed, DCAL revealed that Belfast’s library services cost £5.5m annually to run and DEL disclosed that apprenticeships have almost doubled in the past five years to c.7,000 places.

According to Health almost nine out of every thousand children in Belfast are on the Child Protection Register, Justice confirmed that 53 prison officers were assaulted last year and DRD confirmed that NI Water faces an eye watering £1.65bn bill over the next twenty years to bring its infrastructure up to EU standards.

COMMITTEES

DRD strapped itself in to consider a Roads Bill, Environment was concerned about Planning Service staff redeployment and DSD bunkered down for two sessions on the Welfare Bill.  DEL was picking NEETs out of its hair, DFP was reviewing the Budget process and OFMDFM was still dawdling along over the Older People’s Commissioner Bill.

DETI got out the popcorn for NI Screen’s strategy, DCAL pondered library provision in Belfast, DARD decanted to the Balmoral Show while Justice considered Tribunal Reform along with a briefing on the Prison Service.

AND FINALLY….

Owen Patterson, the new NI SoS, is promising that Northern Ireland will take its fair share of upcoming cuts in the UK’s budget, but that they won’t be drastic. He’s also confirmed that Dave ‘PM’ Cameron is still planning to visit Northern Ireland shortly to view the wreckage of our bloated, state subsidized economy- still, that’s in marginally better shape than his pact with the UUP.

Tales of UCUNF’s demise may, however, have been premature.  Despite running a campaign which would have embarrassed a Jnr High Classroom President election, UCUNF still managed to attract over 100K votes.  With more new faces, some more time and an Idiots’ Guide to Electioneering, they might actually do quite well at next year’s Assembly election if the much vaunted Dave effect comes back into play.

THE WEEK THAT WAS….

2,721 votes cast out of a total of 673,871 doesn’t seem much.  That’s because it’s not.  In fact, it’s a paltry 0.4%, but in business and in politics, it’s victory in the margins which can make all the difference.

1,534 votes in East Belfast were all that stood in the way of an impressive overall DUP result which saw the party knock back the UCUNF challenge across Northern Ireland and put the TUV back in its box.  In light of the scandals, the brouhaha over Policing & Justice and a European election in which the TUV captured 40% of the DUP vote, many in the party would have settled for a 25% share of the vote.  Losing a seat which you’ve held for 31 years and a leader who is regarded as your sharpest political operator does, however, rather take the gloss off.

1,183 votes in South Antrim and four votes in Fermanagh & South Tyrone were all that stood in the way of a decent performance for the UUP’s ‘brave new world’ with the Tories and political calamity.

Two seats would have allowed a rejuvenated Reg to welcome the dawn of a new way of doing politics in Northern Ireland.  He could even have been contemplating the prospect of a Jnr Ministry in Westminster.  Instead, like Robinson, he’ll be spending his time contemplating the sun setting on a career which has spanned forty years.  It’s an unforgiving business and there’s the finest of lines between been viewed as a political whizz kid and a political numpty. 

Indeed, in an ironic twist it’s a veritable triumvirate of gloom for all Unionist leaders with the TUV’s Jim Allister polling poorly in North Antrim and left wondering if there’s a role left for his brand of Unionism.

Alliance, Sinn Fein and the SDLP can all, however, sit back and bathe in some well earned political sunshine.  With a hung parliament nationally though, there must be a strong possibility of a Westminster re-run before the Assembly elections next year.  Don’t get too excited – sequels never tend to be as good.

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

Oral Answers

The DCAL Minister discussed making school sporting facilities more accessible to local communities and made it clear that there will be no additional funding for his upcoming minority languages strategy. Over at Education the Minister was rounded on from across the political spectrum over the school build programme, particularly the dilatory replacement of Whitehouse PS in North Belfast.  She did, however, announce a further £3m for free school meals.

The DEL Minister outlined his steps to tackle both graduate unemployment and NEETs, and defended his record on promoting STEM subjects, despite their falling popularity.

Written Answers

Another slow week for Questions, but OFMDFM revealed that running costs for the NSMC Executive were £645K, DCAL is reviewing funding for sports clubs named after those with criminal convictions while Education noted that of the 2,894 pupils in Irish-medium schools just five are from the Protestant community.

DETI estimated that there are 43,000 workers born overseas working in Northern Ireland and revealed that they’ve set aside £100K to market the Titanic’s centenary.  DoE disclosed that the CEO of Newry City Council is the second highest paid in the Province (picking up between £110K – £120K pa) while Health noted the average Doctor’s income was £91K.  31 people are being electronically tagged in Foyle according to Justice.

COMMITTEES

No Statutory Committee meetings were held this week.

AND FINALLY….

In case you missed it, Stormont actually did sit for a day this week, not that anyone noticed, bothered or cared.  The Members were, however, getting rather worked up about waste, reserving some of their harshest criticism for litterbugs. 

The Assembly may have debated murder, child abuse, human rights abuses and drug dealers, but nobody is apparently as bad as the “parasites and scumbags” who pebbledash our streets with chewing gum and general detritus. 

Glad to know that while the streets of Greece are burning and the markets are plunging our legislators haven’t lost their sense of perspective….